Pity Party of 1

I've come to realize that I have allowed myself to have a pity party about moving here.  Not the type of pity party where I'm constantly crying or questioning the move.  I'm not even in the zone of anger or the whole "poor Geneyem" phase.  I say pity party because I don't have a thankful heart and all I've been doing is grumbling about what I don't have anymore, so basically being self-focus.  I have allowed myself to be in a state of constantly looking at "what I could have had" if we were still in California rather than opening my eyes and allowing the Lord to use me here in Washington.  I've been focusing on the fact that I miss my friends (which isn't bad) rather than noticing the amazing people God is starting to place in our lives.  It's so easy to focus on the bad and what you lost and start a downward spiral of sadness.  Being sad is not sinful or bad, but allowing those feelings...actually any feelings, to be your main focus rather than the Lord Jesus Christ is sinful.  Oh how I have allowed my feelings to control a lot of my thoughts. 

Psalm 9:1 says, "I will give thanks to the LORD with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds."  Oh my whole heart is not thankful.  I have allowed it to drift from a thankful heart to a grumbling heart.  I complain about the weather, the move, the fact that I'm not back in California that I'm not seeing His wonderful deeds that He is doing here in Ferndale.  This grumbling heart was so subtle that I didn't even realize that I stopped being thankful. 

Oh Lord help me to be thankful.  Help me stop focusing on myself.  Help me to have eyes to see your wonderful deeds here in PNW.  Lord please forgive me for not being thankful with my whole heart.  Forgive me for having a grumbling heart rather than seeing Your goodness through this move.  Use me for your kingdom here as you used me in West Covina.  Help me to serve those around me and be the arrow that always points to Jesus.  Thank you for allowing me to see my sin, allowing me to see my pity party and help me to kill it.  Although at times I am lonely and miss my friends, I know Lord that you are always here and I need to just wait and see You work in our lives.  Thank you for your grace and mercy that I do not deserve.  In Jesus Name, Amen.